Me: You know, instead of reading that book, you could actually help me do some work.
Co-worker: I’m not technically reading. It’s a book of photos.
Me: I know, I know. I just assumed that looking at a picture book would be the closest you’d ever get to reading, and I wanted to sound encouraging.
Co-worker: Cheeky fuck.
Me: But hey, it’s a step up from your usual books. At least these pictures don’t ‘pop up’, like the last best seller you presumably thumbed through. And I know, chapter three when the little dog found the ball was riveting, and I’ll be damned if I didn’t cry at the end of chapter six when little Timmy found his teddy bear, but if we might delay conversations of contemporary literature until perhaps after you help me stock up the bar? What do you say, champ?