Doc: Brace yourself, Marty. When this baby hits 88 miles per hour… You’re going to see some serious shit. Police: Doctor Emmett Brown; stop the vehicle. We have reason to believe you have stolen nuclear materials on board. Doc: Holy shit, Marty! Get in! Marty: Woah, Doc. What’s going on? Doc: Come on, just get […]
… And on a totally, absolutely, obviously unrelated note; he’s currently plugging and promoting his new book, which happens to be about an alien landing, buried in a government conspiracy. I find it astronomical the audacity, and the soulless desperation, of some people who try to take advantage of other, naive and gullible, people. Then […]
To pee, or not to pee? Well, not to pee; would be the short answer. Seriously guys, that’s a little messed up.
Still, I know people with far stranger paraphillias, so it would be inconsistent to dismiss this one. Anyway, I’m not going to examine the potential psychological reasons, or the subconscious motivations, or even the difficulty associated with brining a new partner into your deep, secret fetishes. No, I just have one niggling, little thought that bugs me about it.
Okay, guys… I’ve come up with a new section. At the restaurant where I work, we give out little comment cards at the end of each meal. Ninety nine times out of ten, they’re pretty dull and unspectacular; but every so often we’ll get some thing really stupid.
This isn’t one of those times. I mean, it’s pretty stupid… But I just felt like writing about one, and this was the best I had. So anyway, keep a look out for some forthcoming Comment Cards post, and we’ll get started with this one!
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This is a story about a boy named Alexander Green.
Alexander really wanted to be a goth. Lots of boys at his school were goth kids and he thought they were very cool. He would often try to hang out with them, but they told him to go away because of his apparent love of conformity and rules. They told him that he didn’t understand. Ironically, Alexander didn’t understand what it was that he was being accused of not understanding.
One day, Alexander decided to become a goth.
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It’s a weird concept, isn’t it; to have a ‘best‘ friend. I find it strange enough; the notion that while you may have lots of friends, one of them in particular is universally agreed to be the one that you like the most, but what’s even stranger is when someone refers to themselves as someone else’s best friend. That’s weird, right? On the one hand, you can be saying to a friend who isn’t your best friend, that someone else is your best friend, and that basically translates as “Have you met Charlie? He’s that guy that I like more than I like you.”, but then for another person to refer to themselves as someone’s best friend is like a declaration that they like you more than they like anyone else. It’s like saying “Oh, hi. I’m Charlie, the guy that Matt likes more than he likes you.”
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Ian: I have to study for this new qualification…
Felix: What’s the paper on?
Ian: Communication.
Felix: Communication? You? You can barely string a sentence together!
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I went to have my haircut recently; yet another of those tedious tasks that I perform, partly as a sort of ritual to show that I do (or at least, pretend to) take some pride in my appearance, and partly because my hair kept poking me in the eyes, and it was on the […]
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