Whilst taking down the details of a young couple that were wanting to join our mailing list at work, I was told that the name of their street was ‘Sandwich Grove’ (which is hilarious because a grove is like a woody area where you grow shit, so… it’s where you grow sandwiches?). I laughed to […]

Upon a recent afternoon at work, I had a group of three middle-aged ladies enter the store and begin pawing through some of the quant gadgets and objets d’art that we have littered across the shelve. After a short while, one of the ladies happened upon a jigsaw puzzle that we sell that, when assembled, […]

I’d spent the day in hospital at my ladyfriend’s bedside, but had to leave to catch the last train home. As I reached the platform, it pulled up and I realised that I was stood next to the ‘First Class’ carriage. I stared down the platform for a moment, to wonder if I could even […]

Here’s an unusual encounter that befell me yesterday. I was at work, quite quiet, very hot, when in walked a fully uniformed policeman. They occasionally make the rounds in my area, popping in just to say hello and reinforce their presence. This chap, however, was a little more memorable than many of his predecessors.

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The story of how a stranger came in to my shop and kind of asked me to cheat on my girlfriend.

I was moving around some boxes in the shop storeroom out back when I heard a faint ‘hello’. I came round to the front of the store and saw, already leaving, a uniformed police officer. This is what he said: ‘Hello! Sorry, don’t mind me, I’m just saying “hello”. I’m Yurgen. It’s what I do. […]

A few handy hints for the on-the-go traveller who is far too busy (being an important, big shot man/woman-about-town, no doubt) to make time for the dreary underling, the tedious former associate, or the slightly mental, and (as you’ve just remembered) weirdly clingy ex-partner. Continue reading →

So, at the staff party the other night, one of my managers got extremely inebriated (well, all of them did, but this story involves just the one). She was given a ‘secret santa’ present (which was well over the spending limit, so… decent gift!) from one of the new guys. It was a pair of, get […]

A conversation between myself (Me), my girlfriend (Becky), and a man at a grocery store checkout (Him), wherein I forgot that people don’t like being corrected; nor do they like know-it-alls, nor do they like it when someone turns a bit of dull small talk into an actual conversation.

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It’s something I’ve thought about a lot before. Do you know that feeling when you tell a joke that you think is really clever, only to be met by the cold silence of people who didn’t understand it?

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