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This article has the added bonus of containing a back story!


Aforementioned bonus back story: So my girlfriend accidentally let my kitten out into the hall, and then a neighbour must have accidentally let him out of the hall, and into the big, scary, wide world. Cue me having to walk around town, tracing his whereabouts like a 19th century detective, getting eye witness accounts and listening for bush rustles. Long story; short… After four hours of calling his name all over the place, a quiet, scared ‘meow‘ began answering me, and I brought him home.

Actual point of this post: People really don’t like people, do they! I, obviously, fit very snugly into that generalisation, but I do at least have manners. The only time I’m really out walking the streets is when I’m going to, or coming from, work; in which case I’m either miserable, or exhausted, respectively, and listening to earphones while staring at my feet.

On this journey however, I had no earphones and I was looking around, which meant looking at everyone I walked past and smiling or nodding or saying “Good afternoon, I’m looking for pussy… Cat! A pussy cat, I mean… I’m looking for my cat! Never mind…”

Let’s say I looked at, and made some sort of polite gesture toward, about 100 people. We’ll use 100, because percentages make me look clever, and I’m shit at maths. Also, it might be about right. Anyway, of the 100 people I smiled at; about 4% smiled back, 2% said something friendly, 60% made eye contact with me and then flat out ignored me, and 33% actually scowled at me, as if they thought I was about to try and mug them. There may be a 1% margin of error, but the guy who set himself on fire and then jumped into the sky singing folk songs was probably a mathematical anomaly.

So, yeah… The point of this rant is that people never smile at strangers. It’s not exactly an effort, and while I do spend some days with the words ‘Piss off, asshole‘ written on my forehead, this was not one of them. Don’t get me wrong, I’m really not a people person. I loathe human interaction more than most; but a simple smile isn’t exactly a big deal to do, in relation to the effect it can garner. Every time a guy smiles at me in the street, I think he should be my new best friend, and every time a girl smiles at me in the street, I calmly walk passed and then immediately think of her as ‘the one that got away‘. Point being; I love it when someone smiles at me. You should all probably do it more.

Also, be sure not to let my cat out again; lest I be forced to patrol the streets and interact with people once more…

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Join the conversation! 10 Comments

  1. Nice blog haven’t smiled today but this surely brought a smile on my face. Good to know you got your cat back!

    Reply
  2. Looking for pussy without a sheaf of five-pound notes in you hand? No wonder you got scowls. My dog managed to nose open the back door yesterday, and three cats got out. Problem was, I only knew about two. Got one within seconds, another in a minute, and then went counting. He’s been declawed, so he can’t climb the fence, but there are lots of gaps at the bottom. Ten minutes later I found him sunning himself on the neighbour’s back walk. Ain’t pet ownership FUN?

    Reply
  3. I smile at pets more than people. BUT I must have forseen this post as I did smile big at someone human today. (cause he was checking me out from his vehicle and held up traffic, YEE-HAA!)

    Reply
  4. I am so happy you found yotur cat. That was one scary experience. I hope that kitty is in good health and spirits and will keep safe inside from now on.

    Herkules & his Mom

    Reply
  5. Too funny. Too funny for words.
    Though I am glad you managed to find your pussy.
    *meow*

    Reply
  6. The good thing is that you got the pussy back home safely…i love cats :)
    And you blog is great, love it.

    Reply
  7. I can totally relate to the first part of this post .. when my Dog go s missing Im forced to wander the streets shouting ” Chaos ?! Chaos ???? Chaos where the bloody hell are you ???”

    Needless to say my entire neighborhood thinks I ve lost the plot ….

    Reply
  8. There’s a reason the saying “herding cats” was coined.

    Reply
  9. Brilliant.

    I often wonder why people want to be chatty on the Tube/tram home and why they cannot leave me alone. I mean, earphones and a book usually spell “Leave me alone” so perhaps they’re just illiterate?

    The worst is when you end up with someone who forces interaction on you when you’re on a flight and you cannot escape; and when he starts talking about foot medicine, I found that just takes it to a new level: http://wp.me/ppqxP-Es

    Reply
  10. I smile at people I pass. They usually look at me like I’m a complete mentalist, and then I don’t feel like smiling any more. (Until the next day, or something). But when they smile back, it makes my day a little bit. :)

    Reply

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About Felix O'Shea

Felix is a guy who isn't actually a writer, but calls himself one when he wants to try to impress gullible people.

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Me complaining about stuff

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