Well, now that Osama Bin Laden has been killed, I guess all that’s left is to sit back and wait for the torrent of thousands upon thousands of Bin Laden jokes that everyone will be scrambling to get out there… So, to get the ball rolling, here is what I have so far…
After they string up Osama Bin Laden’s corpse, the White House staff will probably just sit around throwing paper aeroplanes at it for a couple of days.
The identities of the Navy Seals who killed Bin Laden must remain confidential, as presumably, they might all be high-fived to death.
So a black guy killed a Muslim guy. I’m white! What do I care!?
They’re letting the Navy Seals take all the credit, but I’m pretty sure it was Vin Deisel and The Rock who took out Bin Laden.
“Knock knock.”
“Who’s there?”
“Navy SEALs”
“Navy SEALs who?”
*BANG*
“… … … …”
*BANG*
“Look at that, I got the sucker.” Okay, Obama was talking about killing an innocent fly, but we still need a sound bite for Bin Laden’s death.
A pair of Pakistani teenagers find an unidentified Arab corpse: “Hey… You remember that old terrorist guy? Well I’ve got a mental idea…”
Obama to Osama: “Tag, you’re it.”
Stay tuned to see President Obama’s “I win, I win, na na na na naaaah na!” dance live on air.
If Obama truly is black, now is as good a time as any to show it: “Yeah, nigga. I smoked you! You don’t mess with the muh’fuckin president! My CIA homies gonna make sure all yo’ kids don’ grow!”
I guess he couldn’t fit his dialysis machine in Saddam’s hidie-hole…
This is going to make for one hell of a clip on World’s Wildest Police Chases.
You know who’s either really smug, or really pissed off right now…? The former 2nd most wanted man on earth.
Yeah, keep celebrating guys! We’re only Al-Qaeda. It’s not like we’re going to retaliate in any horrific, unspeakable manner or anything.
You know who the real victim is in all of this, right? Me… For having just perfected an Arabic version of Bon Jovi’s ‘Wanted Dead or Alive’.
Finally, click here to read The Final Will and Testament of Osama bin Laden. It’s the real thing. It’s not a joke!
Okay… Maybe it’s a joke…