A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says “Why the long face?”, and the horse says “I have terminal cancer.”

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What do you call a donkey with three legs?

Crippled.

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A priest and a rabbi sit down for dinner. They soon start to angrily argue about their respective faiths, and they are asked to leave the restaurant.

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A bear walks into a bar.

Bartender: Hey, friend. What can I get you?
Bear: I’d like a pint of lager… … … … … … and some dry roasted peanuts.
Bartender: Why the big pause?
Bear: My wife just died.

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What’s yellow and dangerous?

SARS infected Chinese people.

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An Englishman and an Irishman go to the pub. A member of the Irish Republic Army destroys the pub, and both men are killed.