Dear mister o’Shea.
This is youre bank, Lloyds or Barclays or whatever, and we are just popping a little email to you to let you know that theres been a bit of a cock-up with our computers and that, and we need to sort some stuff out with your bank account.
There was a little glitch that meant you lost some money, or uhh… got some extra money or something like that (its all well complicated so I wouldn’t bother looking into it), and we’ve gotta sort it out and that, so we just need to grab some details off you, if thats cool.
Please send us your account number, PIN number, security number and whatever else we might need, and we’ll clear it all right up… Also we’ll put a bit extra in your account or give you a bonus or something like that, just for the hassle… Actually, maybe photocopy your bank card or credit cards and send that to us too.
Our main site is down or busted or knackered up and stuff, so please stick all them things in an email and whack it over to our official backup server SolidRicky69@gmail.co.uk and it’ll all be taken care of, quick as a flash.