The Service Station Graveyard

Right, so tonight, my girlfriend Rebecca and I were on our way back from Lancaster at about midnight, making the long drive home… When all of a sudden, hunger struck. Hard.

“Services: 2 Miles”

Fucking brilliant… And don’t think I didn’t see that Burger King sign. It is, of course, the worst of the fast food giants, but by god, were we too hungry to care.

We pull in, park up and literally run upstairs, our mouths watering at the thought of the chewy bun, ambiguous meat and plastic cheese… But to our horror, we were met with this sorry sight…

Okay, you know what… That’s fine. There is another restaurant here, so I’m sure I can get over the loss of a shitty Burger King burger… As long as there are plenty of other lovelies to choose from…

Right, well… If I’m honest, I don’t really fancy a single dried up sausage, nor am I the kind of reckless gambler who will risk it all to find out what’s in ‘The Mystery Pie‘, so perhaps I’ll have a look what we have on the old buffet table…

It’s still fine. It’s all good. I guess I’ll just have something from the pastry rack…

Come on guys, there has to be something here for me…

For fuck’s sake. Fine. Whatever. I’ll just grab a drink and… Oh, you’re fucking kidding me…